I just re-watched 4x21 (no spoilers)

[growyourwings]

It took the amazing high I had on from my job interview to give me enough fortitude to watch it.  I almost stopped again at one point.

Now I feel sad again--not quite as dejected as last night.  My interview high and some of the great meta thoughts on the episode from the flist has given me a few rays of hope.

But man it was still very painful to watch again.